3.1.52: Sir

 

Alex

      Ethan calls me, saying he's on the way to my house. Scrunching my eyebrows and tilting my head to the side, I tell him to come on over.

     I'm immensely curious as to what he has to say. I have my hopes, but I don't want to raise them. "So what do you have to tell me that you didn't want to say over the phone?"

      His smile drops off his face. "You asked me to find your son."

      "Yes?" My heart starts beating faster. "Did you find anything?"

      I have been trying daily to get through the Sixam firewall, but their technology is centuries ahead of ours. I would need to get my hands on one of their computers to even begin to stand a chance. However, that hasn't stopped me from trying to find a way that they didn't think of, a way that lesser technology can slip through the cracks. I could learn a lot from them, but frankly, I've had my fill of aliens for a long, long while. ...In everything except finding my son.

      "Well, I have good news, and I have bad news." Without asking me which I'd prefer to hear, he continues, "The good news is that I found him."

      I take in a quick breath. "You did?" The corners of my lips raise. Yes! "Is he okay? Have you seen him? How did you find him?" I would fire more questions but that he interrupts me.

     "He's fine. Calm down."

      "Calm down? I haven't seen my son since the day he was born, and you're asking me-"

      "Okay! Wrong thing to say," he quickly interjects, letting out a puff of air. "I finally got someone in the Sixam government that would cooperate with me, and she figured out which boy was your oldest. By the way, damn, Alex! What happened to you when they abducted you?"

       My lips purse for a moment. "I'd really rather not talk about it if you don't mind."

       "Okay. You're right. I probably don't want to know."

       I realize something. "What's the bad news?"

      "He doesn't want to see you."

      I feel my face fall. After everything I went through...

      Ethan raises his hand. "Hold up. The Sixams have brought him anyway. He's outside."

      "WHAT? Why the plum didn't you say that at the beginning?!"

      "Because I thought I'd... Oh, come on." He leads me to my front porch as if I don't already know the way.

       'He doesn't want to see you,' echoes in my brain. But there he is! At least... I assume that's him? Maker, I expected maybe a toddler. It hasn't been that long since he was born. I look off in front of the porch and see Sixam officials standing and watching. I don't miss the weapons they wear on their belts. They did say the Prexans were their mortal enemies. They're treating my son like a dangerous criminal. But he's still my son!

     The boy turns and looks at me, sizing me up. All I can think is how hard I've searched for him, and here he is!

 

     He speaks before I can. "Alexander Goth, I'm told? So you're my human father." His voice has the same tinny pitch to it that AD's would sometimes have, and I have a sense that I need to run somewhere and hide. But this is my SON!

     "Y-yes. I have been looking for you ever since they took you from me."

     He continues as if I hadn't said anything. "Well, I suppose you're not as pathetic as some of the humans I've seen. Your brain seems bigger than the doofus behind me. I'd wondered if the mothers were just desperate when I'd heard about how old you are, but now I think I understand. Your hair looks a shade darker than the faint memory I have of you."

     "Excuse me?" I ask, not understanding. I take a step back. This isn't quite the heartfelt reunion I'd hoped for.

     "My only question, Mr. Goth, is why in plum would you be looking for me?"

      "Be... because you're my son." My heart continues to sink. He doesn't even speak as a child would.

      "You have many other children. Why not search for them as well?"

      "You're the one I carried."

      "Ah. I see then. You merely need to overcome the oxytocin effect."

      "Excuse me?" I ask again. I suppose there will be no 'would you like to live here' moment.

      "Humans and their attachments. It's your juvenile evolutionary byproduct."

      "Have you forgotten you're half-human?" I scowl, my eyes going to slits by the persistent insults.

      "I try every day to forget."

      My voice betrays my souring mood. "So sorry to inconvenience you, um,... what IS your name anyway?" I quickly remember those nights in prison when I would try to think of names to call my baby.

      "I am XA3641.

      "But I am more commonly simply referred to as 'Sir,'" he finishes.

      My heart plummets to the earth's core. If Selena were here, she would use him as a prime example of that 'darkness' that resides within me. Yes, 'Sir' is my son. Once again, Goths have produced a monster. I can feel it.

      He watches my features, reading my internal dialogue. "Have I satisfied your curiosity to an adequate degree? Because the Sixams are sick to plum of your hopeless attempts to hack into their network as you tried to find me. It makes no difference to me how much you irritate them, though. Thanks to you, the Prexans are all imprisoned." He looks me up and down again. "At least now I have a face to put to the name. A face that I will always remember with shame."

      One of the Sixams speaks, "It's time, XA."

      He looks at them with even more annoyance than he gave me. "Yes. I suppose it is." 

       My mind reels from the short conversation I just had. I wasted my time. He doesn't want to know me. He's, in fact, ashamed to be descended from the one who turned in his people. I guess I never thought about that--how they'd poisoned him against me, poisoned all the children into forgetting their fathers. I never considered how he'd despise me. 

      "I'm sorry, Alex," Ethan tells me sincerely.

      I watch as 'Sir' gets in the waiting Sixam vehicle. "Oh. Sure. Yeah." I take a deep breath. "Thanks for all your help, Ethan."