Uncomplicated 2.20: Don't worry

     Bonnie spends more time just being a teen. I feel so guilty for what I've done to her this past month or so. She simply shrugs and tells me it was no big deal when I talk about it with her. The girl won't let me apologize! Being the drama queen that she was, I'm surprised to see this selflessness from her.
     However! The second the subject of boys comes up, the drama queen comes back out. Judging from the phone calls I hear, she and Shravan aren't doing so great lately. I can't say this upsets me.

     One night, I stand, holding a sleeping Anastasia, in the hallway and overhear a conversation between Bonnie and Dad. She asks him about Mandi, about where she is and if he's seen her. He acts surprised to hear that she died. He hasn't seen her at all.
     It's probably nothing. After all, Dad's mostly around the house. For some reason, Mandi isn't around the house. I wish she'd show up. What if she never shows up? What if I can't learn this recipe quick enough?

     Bonnie has taken note of my all-black attire. Even though I never married Mandi, I consider myself a widower. Bonnie teases me about going goth. Sometimes, I consider actually going goth for a few days just to see what she'd do. I haven't yet... Yet.

     My main focuses are my children and building my skills in order to successfully perform the task of bringing Mandi back. I do all the cooking, and I'm getting quite good at it.

     My books get forgotten, but we're not exactly hurting for money, even after purchasing that recipe book from the psychic lady I saw.
     I spend my days studying, fielding the sweet-but-ever-changing moods of Bonnie, and taking care of my little Anastasia.
     "At least you're not on the phone all the time, are you, Anastasia?" I croon to her while she chews on my collar.

     Every day, I see more and more of myself in the baby.

     That I don't see much of Mandi in her is bittersweet. I'd actually hoped that she'd resemble her mother.

(EA pose/animation designers... LAZY! Look at that bicep! That's easily avoided with proper joint rotation.)

     Too much... She looks too much like me. I realize my darker eyes and hair are more dominant traits, but I'd wanted to see some of Mandi in her.
     Believe me, I love her to pieces. She and Bonnie are my whole world, and I almost feel guilty for spending the time studying like I do. To make up for the guilt, I spend more time with them. Well, as much time with Bonnie as she lets me.
    But I have to study!... I'm torn. I want Mandi back asap, but I also don't want to miss out on my daughters' lives. BUT, I don't want Mandi to miss out on them either, and the sooner I can get her back, the more Mandi can share with them.
    If I get her back.

     What if I never get her back? What if she stays lost forever?
     Mandi! Where are you? Why won't you at least visit me?

     "Yes, we have a swimming pool. That's because we're in Sims 3. Swimming pools have been around since the dawn of sims, but they won't be in Sims 4. But don't worry, Anastasia, you won't be in Sims 4 either, so you won't miss them."

     Anastasia's first word.

     Another burglar?!

     Bonnie springs into action and initiates a fight. The burglar patiently waits outside for her, not triggering the house alarm and waking Anastasia and me up. I hear about this later.

     Way to go, Bonnie!
     Wait... I'm a dad and shouldn't be this happy that she confronted a burglar. Oh what the hell, I'm proud. The cops in this town are worthless anyway; I can't decide if they're crooked or just not motivated.
     The burglar goes running off, scared to death of Bonnie kicking her butt again.

     A few nights later, I hear a strange sound. At first, I assume it's another burglary attempt. Then, I wonder if it's Mom or Dad. 
     It's... Mandi!
     Wait... That's Mandi?

     I find her in the living room, looking at the bookshelf. My voice chokes out her name, and she turns around and hugs me. I hug her back as much as I'm able, having momentarily lost my ability to speak further.
     She feels strange in my arms. I've never touched Mom or Dad in their spectral form. I can hold her in my arms, but at the same time, I almost feel like I'm pretending.
     "I'm sorry," she says in her strange voice. "I'm so sorry. I tried; I tried to hold on. I couldn't. I tried to save her, but I couldn't."
     "No. She's fine. She's fine, Mandi," I manage to say before she can get on a never-ending apology.

     "No, no. No. My baby..."

     "She's fine!" I say, thrilled I'm finally talking to the spirit of the woman I love. "She lives! I named her Anastasia, like you liked. Come and see her. She's upstairs..."
     "Nick, don't do this to me," she pleads, and although it's hard to see, I think she's crying. "I can't find her. I'm sorry to leave you and lose her."
     "But I'm telling you the truth!" I happily exclaim. "She's adorable even if she's unlucky enough to look like her father."

     "Nick, stop. Please," she begs.
     What can I do to make her understand?! It's like she's fixed, unbelieving no matter what I say.

     So, instead of mentioning Anastasia with my request, I simply say, "Come upstairs." I'd run upstairs to get the toddler myself, but I worry that Mandi would leave before I could come back. I also fear what Anastasia would do if she saw a ghost.

     Mandi misunderstands my meaning.
     Kissing a ghost: very strange. But this is Mandi! Her essence is all around me, and she's corporeal enough that I can hold her, touch her, kiss her...

     "Mandi, what are you doing?"
     She turns to me with a happily-wicked smile. "We never did it in your parents' bed."
     "But..."

     Oh, who am I kidding? I don't put up any resistance.

     I think of something. "Come and see what I've done with Bonnie's old room."
     I immediately wish I hadn't said a word. Mandi's face turns to a look of anguish. "The baby's room! I'm so selfish. I have to go!"
     "No! Mandi..." I try to grab at her, try to make her stay and hear reason, but my hand passes right through her.

     "No!" I cry in vain as Mandi evaporates into a puff of yellow-orange smoke. Then, she whisks off in the direction of her grave marker.
     What do I do now? She still thinks Anastasia died! Why wouldn't she listen to me?!

     Still... Mandi was here. She was HERE! She finally visited, meaning I can go forward with my hopeful plan.
     Don't worry, Mandi. I won't let you wander the town looking for your lost child for long.
     I get up and change my sheets.

     While Anastasia naps, I redouble my efforts at studying.

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Mandi's ghost looks the way she does because (curious since I haven't done that yet) I chose the "fall from a high place" death in MC. That's what those ghosts look like, apparently. O.o

Upon moving to the "new" town (when I'd restarted in hopes to avoid the plague of error code 12's), I somehow lost Damion Rao, Levi and Sunshine's oldest. I don't think I'm going to redo the bit I've done. He's just "lost in the sands of time" as my middle child likes to say.

Rose 2.25: Put all the eggs in the basket

     I decide to read a little more before Tiffany gets here. I never told her where I live, but I guess she knows. After all, it's visible from the main road that has the coffee shop, bowling alley, etc, and she must've seen us at some point.
     The words on the page start jumbling up as my mind starts wandering. What was it Shauna said? Thinking more seriously now.
     I lost Tiffany once, and now I might have a chance to get her back. I've lost Shauna, and Willow has disappeared. Hanna invites me to parties nearly every night, but I don't want Hanna.
     I close the book and let out a sad, pathetic whine before resting my elbows on my knees and my head in my hands. I want Tiffany back. Is this why I've been moping around lately?
     Tiffany will not take me back unless I commit to only her. I lean back against the couch and let out a groan while my hands cover my face. The doorbell rings. I didn't even know we had a doorbell.

     I give Tiffany a quick tour of the little house Clark and I built, ending at a mural I've been working on when I get a chance.
     "This is... really small, Donovan," she says, looks in the window, and bites her lip like she's trying to keep from saying more.
     "I know, but it's only Clark and me." How could I have forgotten just how blue her eyes are?
     "Where is Skye anyway?"
     "You wouldn't believe me if I told you... Then again, maybe you will." I tell her what's happened with my brother, and her eyes light up at the possibility of dragons. I can see dozens of questions in those sapphire eyes, but I don't want her to ask them right now.
     "I've had such a hard time this semester," I change the subject and pout a tiny bit, hoping for sweet sympathy.
     She nods, looking almost as sympathetic as I want. "Shauna breaking up with you must've gotten you down," she says, artfully throwing in a barb. I can make it work for me, though.
     I don't want to admit, not even to myself, how much Shauna hurt me, but even more, I don't want Tiffany to see. She watches me closely.
     "Yes, that hurt for a little while, but having very little money has made this semester difficult."
     She tells me how she thinks it's wonderful how I've refurbished things that others have thrown out, saving the environment and all.

      "Well, we only get one planet... unless The Maker decides to reset everything," I respond.
      She giggles, and I love the sound. Tiffany... Tiffany with the sapphire eyes and smells like flowers. My Tiffany.
     Wait... not my Tiffany. I suddenly want to grab hold of her and never let go.
     Can I do this?
     "I have missed you," I breathe.
     Her eyes drop to the ground and then pop back up to me before she smiles shyly and answers, "Well, I've been here the whole time."
     "I know. And the whole time, I have been so stupid."
     She looks at me like she doesn't trust my words. "What do you mean?" she asks carefully.
     I think of how to say it. "I have always told you to go out, that we're young, that you have to live life when I have been denying myself a part of life." Her eyes question me, and I continue, "I have denied myself the happiness people feel when they know someone is committed to them."
     She pauses, watching me. I try to tell her with my expression that I mean what I said. Then, her lower lip trembles, and tears start filling her eyes. "Don't play me, Donovan," she says in a shaky voice, takes a step back, and puts her hand out to stop me when I try to follow her. She turns and escapes into the house just as the full moon rises over the horizon.
     Escape to the house? With only one entrance and exit? If she really wanted me to leave her alone, she'd leave to go back to her dorm. I wait half a minute and then follow her in there.

    When she turns her head to look behind her and sees me walk in, she spins around to say, "Donovan, you know I can't have the kind of relationship you want. Don't taunt me, making me think you can give me what I want. I didn't think even you could be that low."
 

     "I have never lied to you," I tell her evenly, watching her closely in case she should try to dart for the door and really leave. "I didn't try to deny it when you would ask me about the other ladies." I mean to say more, that I'm not lying to her now, but she starts talking before I can.
     "The other ladies..." she says thoughtfully. "And now those ladies aren't available, so what am I? The consolation prize?" Her hands take on a greenish glow, even more than everything around us.
     Bravely going forward when all the warning signs are there of an impending attack, I take her face in my hands. "No. You are the first woman I ever wanted. I should've stopped there, but I didn't. Now, I see my mistake. What I need was, as you said, there all the time."
     "I came over here to see if there was anything I could do to help you because you sounded so depressed. I didn't come here to listen to this. Forgive me, Donovan, but I don't believe you." She pushes my hands away and tries to walk around me, but I wrap my arms around her and stop her.
     "Don't go," I beg.
     "You're not serious; you're never serious. That's who you are; I've accepted that. But honestly, I don't understand how you can spread yourself so thin yet still feel emotionally satisfied," she tells me, lightly pushing me.
     "I'm not, and that's the problem, I think. I thought if I could just have more, I would be fine, but it's not worked. Ever since I lost you, something has felt out of place. Please believe me when I say I want to try. I want to... put all the eggs in the basket." I'd heard that expression once from Skye when he talked about the chickens he and his elf wife had, how she taught it to him. I think I got it right.
     Suddenly, she smiles. Then, she starts giggling. I smile at her since she's stopped trying to push me away, and she starts laughing louder.
     "What is it?" I ask.
     One hand covers her ruby lips to hide her smile for a moment. Then, she uncovers it before she says, "You said that wrong. It's 'put all your eggs in one basket.' As in, take everything you have and take a gamble that you don't drop that one basket which would break all of your eggs instead of only a few." Her smile fades, and she looks at me like she might believe me. Her eyes still look worried, however.

     "Well, that is what I want to do; though, you are not a basket. You are a beautiful woman that I want to be my one-and-only girlfriend."
     "I can't make you happy," she says very quietly.
     "Tiffany!" I quietly exclaim, wanting to shake some sense into her. "You already are! I have missed you! And I know why: I love you." I kiss her to prove it. As I do, I feel pieces of my life start clicking into place. I want to bring Tiffany to Monte Vista. I want to do the most serious thing I possibly can, marry her. Of course, that will have to wait for a while, but that is what I want. Other than knowing which career path to travel, I've never been more certain of anything. I'm a new man, recycled from the old one.
     I think she believes me because she melts into me, and I hold her tighter.
     When our lips separate, words come pouring out of hers. "I love you too, Donovan. And you drove me crazy! I never thought this would happen, so I tried to get myself to accept it. But now, it has, but I'm so worried!"
     I quickly kiss her to make her stop her worries. "I will prove it to you with time," I tell her decidedly. "Okay?"
     She nods, and I officially have a girlfriend. It feels... nice.

     The semester continues, and I don't see Tiffany as much as I'd like because I still feel my house needs a little more something. She understands and doesn't mind because she's studying hard. When we do manage to find time for each other, we run Clark out of the house if he's there. He accuses us of being nauseatingly lovey-dovey. I don't understand why; he acts the same way with Karri.
     The sky rains frequently, but I keep trying to find the furniture I need. The rain actually drives me onward. Clark and I have to eat outside because that is the best place for our table and chairs. Our sink and bathroom are outside. I don't like that.

     I still don't feel like I have everything we need, but I do finish my mural.

     Then, I get asked to do one for the bowling alley. Actually, it's an opportunity to do three murals.

     Amazingly, this also helps my grades.

     I find a larger dining table, and since I got a little money from the opportunity, I decide on what to do...

     The bathroom is still outside, but I like this improvement.

     Another mural.

     The mural art has helped my grades, but Clark's grades keep sinking. So, he uses his brain analyzing machine frequently to try to bring them up. Eventually, he begs his professor for a good grade, and he gets one!
     I also make an A, but even better, I finally get to graduate!

     During the ceremony, I think about how much I've changed, even in the last few weeks. I've learned that if I have to, I can make it on my own. I've learned that having one, good woman is better than unsteadily having three or so. Tiffany is wonderful! We still haven't slept together, but I don't want to push her. Instead, I'm enjoying everything about being in love. I guess I've loved her for a while now, and it took the right sequence of events to finally get it through my head that I did.
     I look forward to what comes next in my life.

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So, Donovan has (finally) completed his LTW: Earn a degree with a perfect GPA. When he graduated, I gave him the photographer's eye trait.
Now, the real fun begins...

Click here to go to 2.26