Chain Reaction 3.32: Completely Serious

Jarvis

      Lottie complains that she's still in formal attire while I'm in my pajamas. She's not interested in my first option to fix that, so I tell her she can borrow some of my clothes. She likes that idea better, and she follows me into the bedroom.

      This thing with her following me in here has two problems: one, it's my bedroom and she's looking too delicious for words; and two, there's, uh, a picture of her on my bedside table. It's tucked behind a lamp, but it's there. I kept meaning to put it back in the drawer where it was for a while, but I hadn't yet. Maybe she won't notice it.

     Anyway, I get her some clothes to change into and go back into the living room.

      "Better?" I ask after she sits down next to me. Then, I notice she's has on... "Where did you find those shoes?"

      "They were under your dresser. I was hoping to find another pair of bedroom slippers I could borrow when I found these. I'd forgotten I'd left them here." They're a pair of shoes she would wear while working at the workbench outside. She'd change from them to another pair whenever she'd work in the store itself. She left them...and I've kept them ever since. This means she went looking around my room, meaning she could've spotted-

     Her voice sounds choked up. "You have a picture of me. On your bedside table. Did Bella ever...?"

     "Bella's never been in my room," I answer her. "I knew that if she did go in there, the temptation would've been too great, and I just wasn't ready for that. With her." I'm sure to add that tag at the end. I guess this proves that I was really only using Bella as a crutch. Like a player. Huh. But not a player in the sense that I was just looking for action.

     Lottie, however: I would happily drag her back into that bedroom. Or, perhaps the bedroom isn't really necessary. The couch could work in a pinch.

     "Jarvis, it's okay." What is? Using the couch? "You and she were together for months, right? I'm not going to get mad if you two slept together." Then, it's like she can read my mind. "And just because she didn't go into your bedroom doesn't mean it didn't happen."

     I'm going to burst into flames right here. She basically just agreed with my thought that we don't have to go to the bedroom. Plus, Lottie isn't wearing a bra.

     I thank every lucky star in the universe that I'm somehow good at kissing. Right here in my arms is the only woman I've ever really wanted, and she feels so good.

     The satin material of the dress she wore earlier was nice, but there are definite benefits to her wearing my clothes. They're looser, which means...

     She gasps when my hand goes under the shirt and happily arrives at second base. I quickly think back to all the times when we were teens and I'd fantasize about this, and I moan in tortured bliss. Her lips break from mine, but I don't care. I still have her neck. Her hand covers mine on the other side of the shirt, perhaps thinking that will stop me. This isn't anything too new. We were making out like crazy before. It's just now I can touch her skin instead of the dress.

     Her voice sounds breathy. "You mean you... You didn't woohoo Isabella?"

     Why is she hung up on this? "No, I didn't." But that doesn't mean I don't know what to do. 

     "It's just that... We've been together for only a few hours. You were with her for about two months."

     I think I know what she's getting at. "And I'm positively bonkers about you."

     "Jarvis, why did you date her?" She sounds hurt. I don't like that, but it's not exactly a fair question.

     I decide to put things into perspective, I hope, with her. "Why did you date Tommy?"

     She gets quiet, and I think I've made her understand... until I notice she's crying. What?!

     "Hey," I tell her, pull my hand out from under the shirt, and kiss her forehead.

     "I'm sorry," she whines. "I ruin everything."

     "That is absolutely not true." What is she talking about? How could this possibly be ruined? Unless she thinks this is a mistake... Plum, no. "What do you think you've ruined?" Please don't walk out right now. It'll kill me. Okay, so we don't have to go as crazy-fast as that was getting. I couldn't help myself. Just like I couldn't help myself earlier at the charity function when I'd first approached her in the garden. I couldn't let her walk away. I couldn't stop myself from somehow wrapping my arms around her. Dancing was a good excuse.

     "I shouldn't have dated him." She sniffs.

     "Plum, Charlotte. I don't care about that now. I only said that for perspective. Maybe I shouldn't have dated Isabella, but I honestly thought you'd never give me a chance." I suddenly see how this conversation could blow up in my face. Ruined... She thinks she 'ruins' everything. I'm not even trying, and everything could still be ruined! I must make her understand! "Lottie, I love you." I start to say more, but she interrupts me.

     "And all I do is hurt people! I try not to, but I do it anyway!"

     "Stop it."

     She doesn't. "I date Tommy, thinking that will make him happy, but I don't love him, so I end up hurting him more. In dating Tommy, I hurt my sister because she's always liked him. I don't date you because I'm scared to death that something will happen to me and you'll be crushed like Daddy was. Then, when I see you with someone else, I get so jealous that I can't stand it, so I selfishly steal you from my own aunt! I'm a monster!"

     "Charlotte, please stop doing this to yourself."

     Then, she says the one thing I've feared ever since Isabella found us: "I should go." She stands up, and I jump up after her.

      "No," I say emphatically, and she gives me a defiant look. "I'm not saying you can't. I'm just saying I'm not going to let you until this gets sorted out."

      "That means the same thing." She's getting mad, and plum it if she's not incredibly hot when she's mad too.

      "No, not quite. Close, but not exactly the same. I mean you could, but you're not going to just easily stroll out of here."

      "Are you trying to pick a fight with me?" She glares, and I have to kiss her. Quickly. I'm playing with fire right now, and dammit if I don't love it. I used to let her have her way in anything, but I am truly scared that if I let her walk out of here that she'll convince herself that all this was a big mistake.

      "I'm trying to stop one," I reply.

      "Doesn't look that way from where I stand."

      "Well, I can't one-hundred percent fix that. But I can fix this 'I ruin everything' bit." I hold her tighter when she struggles for a second.

      "Jarvis!" she yells in frustration. "Do I have to hurt you?"

      I know she means physically, but I decide to use the other meaning. "Nothing would hurt more than if you suddenly were to decide all this was a mistake. That's my biggest fear."

      She wilts and starts crying again. "All I do is hurt people."

      "That's not true. You're not hurting me."

      "But I did hurt you--all because I didn't want you to be hurt. How messed up is that?"

      "Sounds to me like the thought process of a very caring, sensitive, selfless woman--who maybe has made a few mistakes along the way, but she's just a sim trying to do the right thing."

      My shoulder feels wet when she whines out, "I love you, Jarvis. I think you're crazy for never giving up."

      "I never really did," I smile and chuckle a bit. I'm reminded of the picture that still sits on my bedside table. I'd taken it down for a while, but it made its way back. "But you're right: I am crazy."

      Her cheek smiles against me as she playfully punches my chest. "I made you crazy."

      "Crazy is as crazy does. Maybe you just brought out the crazy."

      She whispers, "I'm sorry."

      "Don't. Don't start that again. Promise me you'll stop thinking you ruin everything--because you don't."

     She gets quiet. After waiting a while, I slowly rock us back and forth. Finally, she speaks. "I can't promise that."

      That actually makes me smile. "Hm. Well, that settles it. If you're not going to stop thinking you ruin everything, I guess I'll just have to keep you here until you realize it. And I may not let you go then either."

      She sighs, mildly exasperated, and lifts her head.

     "Jarvis, be serious."

     "Oh, I'm completely serious." Plum, she is so beautiful. And I'm not just thinking appearance. "Very serious." I let out a content sigh. "Will you marry me, Charlotte Renee Taylor?"

      Her wonderful eyes fly open, and a beautiful smile lights up her features. "It's too soon to ask that!" She lets out a little, happy giggle.

       I can't help but smile back. Then, I give a mock shrug and say, "Well, we both agree I'm crazy." I hug her tightly, not expecting any more answer to my request. I'm relatively sure that someday I'll get a yes.
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Next chapter: We hear from Isabella

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