Chain Reaction 3.6: Boys and Girls

Charlotte

       I'm in the park playing pirate when I hear Tommy come over. We've spoken a few times at school, and he acted like nothing weird happened when he kissed me. I'm glad because that was weird. He must not have meant anything by it. I'm glad.

       Tommy has, though, started pestering me about hanging out with Jarvis. He says he's too old for me to hang out with him. That's just crazy. Jarvis acts just like he did when he was a child. His voice is just different and he's a giant now. Tommy says Jarvis is taking advantage of me helping him, but I tell him I don't mind. He can't convince me to stop hanging out with him.

       He slides down the slide to the bricks.

       "Man overboard!" I call out.

      "What are you talking about?" he asks me as he walks around to the side.

      "That's what you say when someone falls out of the boat." Doesn't he know that?

      "So I'm swimming in the ocean right now?" He looks like he's teasing me. Tommy gets this 'look' on his face a lot like he thinks I'm cute or funny when I'm just doing regular stuff.

     "Yeah. Hope you can swim," I tell him a little too seriously. I don't like it when he looks at me like that.

      We play pirates for a while when I look off the starboard side and see a cardboard box poof into existence. I climb down from the crow's nest.

     Tommy jumps in front of me. "You're going to search it for stuff for him, aren't you? Like a trained dog. Is that what you want in a friend?"

      "I'm helping him, he's..." I can't tell Tommy that Jarvis is a runaway. Jarvis went back and told his mother he was fine, and she called off the search. It's like she understands that he needs to make his own way. It's just he needs money and I can help! I also sneak food out of the house and bring it to him. He always smiles and says I don't have to, that he catches fish and can afford to buy his own food, yet he always finishes every crumb of what I bring him.

      Tommy thinks he's finishing my statement. "He's trying to gather things to sell for the flea market stall he runs. I know. You don't need to help him with that."

      "Tommy, I like to." I roll my eyes. He thinks he's 'protecting' me from Jarvis.

      "Then get it later. Right now, I'm a little tired. Let's look at the clouds."

      I sigh. "Fine."

      "Do you miss your mom? Wait. That's a dumb question. Sorry. I just think it's awful. Yet you're always so happy. Not saying that's bad." He sighs. "I'll stop talking now."

      I actually giggle. "She's been dead for a while now. Yeah, I miss her. Sometimes, I think I see her. It sounds crazy. But, I mean, I don't want to go around sad all the time."

      "I don't know what I'd do if my mom died." His parents and my dad used to be good friends, but they grew apart over the years. I like his mom. She tells me to call her Kelsie instead of Mrs. Keenan. Tommy continues, "I think it's wonderful how you can be happy anyway."

     I smile. This is what I like about Tommy: he can pick up little things like that, and he's real protective if he thinks someone has been wronged. As for my mom, I don't remember very much of her. I just remember being scared and sad. I guess I didn't understand what was going on. I cry when I think about it too much--just because I feel cheated. I think that's why Tommy feels protective over me.

     "I think she wouldn't want me to be sad. Daddy told me she was a very happy person. Maybe I get that from her."

     "I think you're right." Something is making him nervous. Maybe he feels embarrassed about talking about my mom. He should change the subject. "Will you be my girlfriend, Charlotte?"

     My mouth drops. Why does he want me to be his girlfriend? We're ten! "Why?"

     "Why not?" he counters. "I think you're the prettiest girl in class."

     "That's kind of impossible since my sister looks almost just like me."

     "But she's grouchy. And bossy. I want to be your boyfriend."

     This isn't happening. Sure, kids claim to be each others' boyfriend and girlfriend in our class sometimes, but I've always thought it was kind of funny. What do I do now?"

      "I don't want a boyfriend, Tommy. You're my friend. I like you like that." Please, please don't get upset. 

      He does. He gets real upset, but he's hiding it, swallowing it down in a way. Sometimes, I really hate this strange way I can feel what others feel. I'd rather not know. I wish I could fix how he feels right now.

     "You're my best friend, Tommy." That didn't help.

     "Okay," he replies, swallowing hard.

     We stand up.

      "But just so you know," he says, smiling in a funny way now, "I can't have a girl as my best friend."

      "What?! Why not?"

      "Girls and boys can't be best friends. That's why I wanted to be your boyfriend."

      Jarvis would disagree on the 'girls and boys can't be best friends' thing.

     "Tommy, you are so weird!" I lightly push him, and he starts laughing. "Get out of my way now because I'm going to find a snow globe."

     Still laughing, he says, "Fine. I'm going home. See you at school tomorrow."

     I can't wait to tell Jarvis what Tommy did today. He'll think it's funny. He'll agree with me that boys and girls can be best friends.

     Wait... What if Jarvis thinks he's my best friend?