Lemming 2.2: Doing Stuff

Who?

      Hugo texts me back after I'd finished my painting, asking who my neighbor is.

Emmett Crews. Isn't that funny?

     I don't get an answer.

     Evening rolls around, and Hugo shows up. I meet him at the bottom of the stairs.

     I hug him, and I can tell something is wrong. I ask him once I've pulled back.

     "Your neighbor is Emmett. Of all the men in the world, it's him," he tells me plainly, not beating around the bush.

     "What are you talking about?" I read his expression. "You think I'm still interested in him?"

     Hugo gives me a look like he thinks I am.

     "I'm not," I tell him, not liking the look in his eyes.

     He relaxes only a tiny bit, and he closes his eyes with a sigh.

     "Can you at least understand why this bothers me?" he asks. "I thought I'd never get you to give up on him, and now you live next to him, sharing a house in essence."

     "It's no big deal. I've been here for a while, and I've only just found out this morning. It's not like I'm seeing him all the time," I say, and he watches my face closely.
     "Jenny, it's not that I don't trust you..." He stops, not knowing how to say what he's trying to say.

    "Well, look at you. I know he can't be that blind, and now, he's not needing to 'focus on his studies' anymore, is he?" he finishes. Then, I see the old, confident Hugo start coming back. I like this side of him much more than the insecure one. "How can he possibly resist the hotness living right next door?"

     I giggle. "Oh, there you are."
     "Yeah, sorry, baby. I guess I have a little jealous streak."
     I grab his hand and pull him up the stairs to come see my apartment.

      I show him the living room, but when we get to the dining room, he surprises me by suddenly yanking me to him and kissing me.

     He's never kissed me like this before. His kisses have always been sweet and simple, but this is a kiss from a man, not a little boy. It's like he wants to devour me. I doubt I could make him stop kissing me...if that's what I wanted. As it is, I want to kiss him. It's an easy way to prove that I love him not Emmett.

     He likes me kissing him back like this, and he responds by further crushing me to him, making my ribs hurt. I have to whimper before he finally releases me enough to where it doesn't hurt. I try to pull back to breathe, but he won't let me...at least at first. When he at last gets the message, he lets me get some air.

    "I love you, Jenny Keilani," he says quietly when he pulls back. "You need to know that. I've always loved you, always, ever since meeting you on the playground that day. I saw you, and I thought, 'now, that's the girl for me.' I'd do anything for you. What can I do to prove it?"

    "What do you mean? You don't have to do anything to prove it. You've done that over and over. Where is this coming from?" I ask, trying to read the desperate expression in his eyes.
    "It's coming from my need to tell you. I just need to tell you," he answers evasively, and I notice his hands fisting themselves in my clothing.
    "Okay," I say gently and reach up to stroke his cheek. He closes his eyes and moderately relaxes. I can't help but wonder if his actions now are a continuation of our discussion on the sidewalk earlier. I need to make him realize that he has nothing to worry about. "I love you, Hugo. You're my wonderful, sweet Hugo that's taught me what it's like to be romantically loved. You once asked me for a chance, a chance to date me and show me how much you care. Now, I'm asking you to give me a chance to do the same thing, to also trust me."
    "I do trust you, Jenny," he says with his eyes closed, but he opens them to say the next thing. "But it's him I don't trust. He may need glasses, but he's not that blind."
     I playfully roll my eyes. "He's not even interested in me, Hugo. He told me that." I kiss the tip of his nose.
     He sighs and completely relaxes.

     I start to make some salad for dinner, but Hugo complains that he's hungrier than salad. So, I change what I'm fixing to pan fried tilapia. I can't help but give a half-smile at his appreciative moans while we stand in my kitchen and eat. Why use the perfectly good dining room? Nah. We just stand here in the kitchen.

     "Jenny, with the prospect of having food this good often, I'm going to need to workout every day or I'll have to roll my way to work in the morning." He laughs quietly.
     "It's just fish, and it's not fried or anything. It's healthy."
     "But if you can do this with 'just fish,' I'm eager to find out what you can do with everything else."

     I give him a sultry look. "I guess you'll have to wait and see, but what if I don't want you disappearing every morning for the gym?" I get brave. "What if I give you your own personal workout?" I think he knows what I mean.
     He puts his plate on the counter, takes mine, and puts it on the counter as well. "You're right. Who needs the gym?" He takes my hands and leads me to my bedroom, guessing correctly since I haven't shown him the way yet.

     Hugo's eager, and I'm ready.

     He's a wild man under the sheets!

     He spends the night. The next morning, I drowsily wake up to him making up his side of the bed. He leans over and kisses me, saying he needs to get home to change and then head to work.

     One day not too long after that, I finish a painting and look up from my easel at what I just painted, but my eyes snap over to where Emmett kneels on the ground, digging at a rock. He looks at the rock so intently, so focused, like nothing else exists in the world but him and that rock.

     He stands up, and I start from surprise. Worried about what he'd think if he knew I'd been staring at him a minute ago, I hurriedly pick up my picture and quickly walk towards my place, leaving the easel where it is.

     One evening, I have my brother over for dinner.
     "Emmett lives next door, doesn't he?" he asks.
     "Yeah. He told me you two work together," I say conversationally, wondering why he mentioned Emmett.

     Justin laughs. "Yeah. He's great. I can't believe we never became friends in high school. I guess we just ran with different crowds."
     More like he was avoiding me because I made him uncomfortable. I always ran with your crowd. I don't think of my high school friends as MY friends. They were mostly Justin's friends that put up with my idiosyncrasies for his sake.

     After we eat some dinner, we sit and talk about stuff. I try to get him to talk about Annalise, but he changes the subject every time. I decide not to push him.
     He leaves, and I sit and watch a few shows on my new television. I hear a knock at my door, and I go to answer it. It's Emmett, and he stands in front of me with an apologetic look on his face.
     "Sorry to bother you. May I come in?" he asks very politely.
     "Uh, yeah, sure," I answer and step back to let him in. As I close the door, I wonder what it is he has to say.

     He goes and has a seat on my little couch, so I decide to sit down next to him.
     "Sorry to invite myself over like this," he starts out.
     "It's fine," I reply, looking across the room instead of at him. Every time I look at him, I can't help but think how he's got the 'adorable geek' look down. My brother looks stupid in his glasses when he wears them, but Emmett makes them work for him.
      "I've had something on my mind lately, and, well, especially since we're living right next door to each other, I thought I needed to air it out," he explains.
     I glance sideways at him and ask, "What?"

     "I want to... I need to apologize for that afternoon when we were teens," he says slowly.
     I'd rather forget about it, thanks, I can't help but think.
     He doesn't hear my thought, so he continues, "What you did took guts, and I don't think I explained myself properly, the things I said."
     "What I did?" I ask, needing him not to leave any doubt in my mind as to what he's talking about.
     He opens his kind eyes and looks at me. I can't look away. "When you'd asked me if I had a girlfriend and I'd told you I didn't want one."
     I free my eyes, slouch back against the back of the couch, and look at the floor. "Oh."
     "Jenny, please hear me out. I want to apologize."

     I turn my eyes back in his direction. "Apologize?"
     He takes in a deep breath. "The only reason I didn't want a girlfriend was that I really didn't want any distractions, anything that would've made my GPA suffer. Sometimes, I can get so tunnel-visioned that I don't see what else goes on around me, and I was focused on getting perfect grades."
     "Okay," I say simply. This isn't news. That was the reason he gave me when I'd asked him.
     "I just wanted you to know that I'm sorry if my reason hurt your feelings. Honestly, it had nothing to do with you personally."
     Not me specifically. I think back to that afternoon. I had assumed he also meant me specifically. After all, he'd said, 'I'm not...interested, Jenny.' I took that to mean me.
     He looks at me like he wants to say some more stuff, but he holds back. Is he waiting for me to say something? I figure I may as well tell him the truth.
     "I...thought you meant just me," I say quietly.

     "No," he tells me quickly. "And that's what's been bugging me, especially lately." His eyes go from serious to begging. "I really need you to understand that, that it wasn't you. Call the high school me a stupid kid in your mind because that's how I picture myself now."
    "It's okay, Emmett. Don't call yourself stupid, even a past you," I say and lean away from the intense look in his light grey eyes. "Maybe I was the stupid kid in thinking that everything was about her."
    "No. You're not stupid. You're brilliant. Your brother showed me some of your art, and you're incredibly talented."
    I offer a half-smile as my thanks for the compliment. "You and my brother have been becoming friends," I state, but it's also a question in its own right.
    "Yes. Right now, I guess you could call him my best friend although I doubt he sees me like that. He makes friends so easily."
    "I don't know how he does it." I shrug. "He's just good at it."
    "Well, he may be good at making friends, but you're the one with the brilliant creativity." He smiles his sweet smile at me, bring the topic back to me. "Like that one right there." He points to the painting on the wall, the one I'd been working on when we'd found out we were neighbors. "It looks like a window instead of a painting; it's so real."
     I blush. "I hung it up there because you said it was good. I was going to just stick it in the bathroom."
     "Your paintings don't belong in a bathroom."
     "What's wrong with going in the bathroom?" I ask. "People spend a lot of time in bathrooms. You know...doing stuff."

      We both laugh like a couple of kids.
       "I guess I can see that that would be a more personal room for art to go, but I like it here in your living room, where everyone will see it," he says with a smile.
     I shrug again. "Okay."
     After a small pause, he says in a more serious tone, "Thank you for hearing out my apology, Jenny. That means a lot to me."
     "Don't worry about it," I say with a small smile. I remember how tortured I felt during school after I'd pretty much told him I liked him and he'd turned me down. I'd gotten good at vanishing until Hugo brought me back into regular society. Emmett hurt me, but I really do believe him now when he says that it was because he was totally focused on his grades and wanted no distractions. After all, I'd seen how focused he'd been on just a rock the other day! He wasn't very good at the time of conveying that message to me, but we were just kids.
     Emmett sits quietly and watches me, and again, I get that feeling like he wants to say some more stuff. He stays quiet about whatever it is, though.

    "Oh, hey, I've invited Justin over tomorrow afternoon to hang out. You should come too. You know, since you're next door and all. I'm ordering a pizza. Maybe we'll save you a slice." He winks at me playfully.
     I laugh. "Okay. Sure, if the geekdom isn't too overpowering," I answer, picturing the two of them doing nothing but eating pizza and playing video games, which I can easily see my brother doing.
     "Hey! I resemble that remark!" he says jokingly, saying 'resemble' instead of 'resent' just to be funny.
     I crack up laughing.
     "Great! Well, see you tomorrow then. Come over whenever," he says, and I wave bye as he gets up and sees himself out.